so .. saya masih terpaksa belajar!
somewhere in the midst of this insecurity, lies my heart. it's lost in there...
i want to do things. i want to do as i like, but something in me forbid me from doing so. i asked for opinions at times and they told me to.. 'just let it go. be free and enjoy life as you should. do not tie yourself to something you are not sure of.' it affected me. things that happenned in the past was a huge slap in my face, as i have never experienced such frustration and pain. when everything got together again, i got confused. but why? 'isn't this all you've ever wanted?' one asked me when i confronted her with my thoughts. yeah, it is.but i got a bit more suspicious over little stuff that i hear and see. i got a little more curious that i'd start asking a lot of awful questions. annoying scenarios play in head over and over again. but when i get the chance to fix it, i tend to forget my main purpose of the rendevous made over the weeks. i detest this feeling. insecurity and hatred is conquering my lost heart right this moment. i've nowhere to turn to but to make sure that i'm remote from every one and things that could distract me from my work!
to the damn!! all i want to do is to get through this as quickly as possible.
and i've had enough of being taken for granted. SO PLEASE understand.
Waking up to find another day
The moon got lost again last night
But now the sun has finally had its say
I guess I feel alright
But it hurts when I think
When I let it sink in
It's all over me
I'm lying here in the dark
I'm watching you sleep, it hurts a lot
& all I know is
You've got to give me everything
Nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me
[CHORUS]
I give you everything that I am
I'm handin' in everything that I've got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don't ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we're gonna do it, come on do it right
All I wanted was to know I'm safe
Don't want to lose the love I've found
Remember when you said that you would change
Don't let me down
It's not fair how you are
I can't be complete, can you give me more?
& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me
[CHORUS]
I give you everything that I am
I'm handin' in everything that I've got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don't ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we're gonna do it, come on do it right
Oh please, you know what I need
Save all your love up for me
We can't escape the love
Give me everything that you have
& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me
[CHORUS]
I give you everything that I am
I'm handin' in everything that I've got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don't ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we're gonna do it, come on do it right
(Give you everything)
(Give you all of me)
Artist: Fergie
Album: The Dutchess
Title: Big Girls Don't Cry
Da Da Da Da [CHORUS] The path that I'm walking [CHORUS] Like the little school mate in the school yard [CHORUS] La Da Da Da Da Da
The smell of your skin lingers on me now
Your probably on your flight back to your home town
I need some shelter of my own protection baby
To be with myself instead of calamity
Peace, Serenity
I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, Myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But Ive got to get a move on with my life
Its time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
I must go alone
I must take the baby steps until I'm full grown
Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they
And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay
I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to with you
It's personal, Myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
Its time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
We'll play jacks and uno cards
Ill be your best friend and you'll be mine
Valentine
Yes you can hold my hand if u want to
Cause I want to hold yours too
Well be playmates and lovers and share our secret worlds
But its time for me to go home
Its getting late, dark outside
I need to be with myself instead of calamity
Peace, Serenity
I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, Myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
Its time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
okay, i'm confused. i don't know what i'm supposed to do. i don't know where to start! i need guidance. i need someone i could rely on and trust. i want to be taken care of and have faith on that person. but how could i tell!!!!!???
i'm sick on bed this moment
can't stop coughing and wondering
what you're up to this second...
i've loads in my thoughts
yet there's nothing yet
that i could interpret
i've slept more hours than i should
i've taken more medicine than i could
but why am i still here?
sick on bed...
it's been more than a day since i heard of you
they've flown
probably arriving this moment
but the running water
of my tap
won't stop damaging the pain in my brain
i miss him
he's far away
the thought of december
it's here to stay
can't wait for things to settle
so i can start planning for the battle
and have my rest
as much as i wish
and no more repetition
of words and images
the next time i struggle
to win her heart.
XD SICK ON BED!
thy seem savage like bacteria
unhand my health
and keep your hysteria
from creeping my thoughts and relief my pain!!!!
