Follow Your Heart - but i think i lost mine...

somewhere in the midst of this insecurity, lies my heart. it's lost in there...

i want to do things. i want to do as i like, but something in me forbid me from doing so. i asked for opinions at times and they told me to.. 'just let it go. be free and enjoy life as you should. do not tie yourself to something you are not sure of.' it affected me. things that happenned in the past was a huge slap in my face, as i have never experienced such frustration and pain. when everything got together again, i got confused. but why? 'isn't this all you've ever wanted?' one asked me when i confronted her with my thoughts. yeah, it is.but i got a bit more suspicious over little stuff that i hear and see. i got a little more curious that i'd start asking a lot of awful questions. annoying scenarios play in head over and over again. but when i get the chance to fix it, i tend to forget my main purpose of the rendevous made over the weeks. i detest this feeling. insecurity and hatred is conquering my lost heart right this moment. i've nowhere to turn to but to make sure that i'm remote from every one and things that could distract me from my work!

to the damn!! all i want to do is to get through this as quickly as possible.

and i've had enough of being taken for granted. SO PLEASE understand.